HELP please! I have 2 girls ages 13 and almost 12(Oct). They constantly bicker with one another. The youngest has gotten so that she back talks alot.
I have punished her different ways with nothing working so far. Any ideas? Both of them like to raise their voices alot, although so does their daddy.

Wish I could help you but my kids are young.....my only advice comes from being a 13 year old girl (a long time ago). Although, I had a brother we used to fight like cats & dogs. My parents didn't really "punish" us, but would separate us. They would make us go outside to play (separately of course) or send us to our separate rooms. After about 15min. my brother & I would be so bored alone that we would decide that playing together nicely was better than arguing. Hope someone else has better advice and you get some help!

I only have one child so I don't have that problem however when I argued and fought with my older siblings, my mother used to guilt us into stopping. She would say that you never know how long you will have each other in your lives and if you argue and then something happens you will always remember how you treated each other. I don't know if I suggest that guilt trip to you, however, it did stop us from truly being awful to each other and never saying things that we would regret which is easy to do when things are heated up. To this day there are things I'm sure we all wish we could take back.

I don't know if a 12 and 13 year old with be able to understand that concept though. Those are tough ages to reason with.

Oh I have an awsome idea. Ground them. Not to their room, but from their room.

Seriously, put all their cool fun stuff in their room. Make them stay out of the room in the living room, family room, kitchen, etc and spend time with the rest of the family without all of their "electronic" stuff (tv, phone, ipod, cd's, dvd's, whatever else) Punishing them by making them spend time with the family as a whole. Add a 1/2 a day to each time they "meltdown". You may find some good quality time with them and you may find them actually enjoying it.

Let them go to their room to sleep and to change clothes and make them get up and out of their rooms by 7:30 am or set a specific time.

If things get bad remove their bedroom door.

I read somewhere where kids that say, yes maam, no maam,yes sir, no sir, etc had better manners were much better behaved and got along better with their siblings and peers. My kids also have to hug- sometimes for a whole entire (killing them) minute, which may turn into a laughing fest- and they have to talk things out. I can't always be their mediator.

Try making them mediate what is fair or not fair.

My moms' favorite thing. Paula can cut the cake in 1/2 - her sister gets to choose which piece she wants- why??? because then Paula will cut it exactly in 1/2 so that both pieces are equal.

Make them sit together in a corner and make them talk (no yelling involved) about why they were fighting and is it worth aggrivating you?

I hope whatever it is, it works for you. Nothing is 100% and you have to keep trying. Mine are 5 and 12 and we have the same issues, it's a constant battle around here. Sometimes I tell them they have to agree to lose a battle to actually win the war (family peace).

Good luck, hope it helps a little.