How to lesson the heartbreak of separation anxiety

Toddler struggles with separation cause many sleepless nights for parents. Torn between leaving a sad child and not giving them the experience of daycare or preschool, thoughts of guilt, concern, and worry preoccupy the minds of parents.

First and foremost, remember that separation anxiety amongst toddlers is normal. It is the rule rather than the exception. The behavior does not reflect parenting styles, but rather displays a normal stage that children go through. Although moms often recognize this fact, nothing removes those feelings of leaving a child upset when it comes time for the dreaded ‘goodbye’.

While nothing completely cures the heartache as your little one grips your leg and cries, there are a few steps you can take to ease the anxiety for both you and your child.

Stick to a schedule

When dropping your child off at daycare, preschool, or a family or friend’s home, try to stick to a schedule. Being dropped off and picked up at the same time each day helps in reassuring children that nothing is out of the ordinary. Coping comes easier when toddlers know what to expect each day.

Remain confident and reward your child

Acting hesitant or nervous about a potential tantrum increases the chance tenfold that one will in fact occur. When dropping your child off, speak in a happy, optimistic tone about various topics that don’t focus on leaving them for the day. Also, mention exciting activities planned for after you pick your child up that afternoon. This creates a rewarding environment where going to daycare makes the fun future activities even closer.

Never forget to say goodbye

It only takes a single episode of forgetting to say goodbye to a child to instill a paranoid sense of unknown. Say goodbye even if you are only leaving for a short period of time in order to calm the nerves and form a bond of trust.

Encourage and support your child every step of the way during these struggles. While episodes may seem inevitable, do your best to ease the anxiety. Remember, if your child remains upset when you leave, most children calm down within five minutes. Familiarize your child with his/her surroundings, tell them you love them, and fight through this difficult growing pain together.

Take it from me, it does get easier.